It’s 11:31 pm and I can’t sleep. It’s not that I’m not tired. I’m actually exhausted. My eyes are heavy. Everything is, was, off in the house. Now just this laptop is on. I know, I know, a laptop won’t help me go to sleep any quicker. Typing this blog may help though.
All day today I have heard a swishing sound in my head. It’s hard to explain. I’ve heard it before, a lot actually since my strokes, but today has been crazy. This evening even more than before.
Today has been a slightly off day, all day. The left side of my head has had a little more of a headache than normal. My left neck has been tight all day. Almost painful. Certainly uncomfortable. Even my left jaw has been sore today. The sound though, that has been the most anxiety causing.
I even just asked my VAD group on Facebook for some advice. “Bruit” is what it seems to be. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK289/ talks about it a little bit. My concern being if the sound is coming from an artery occlusion, that would likely be what I would hear just before another stroke. If it is coming from turbulent blood flow, well, not much I can do about that.
The constant fear of the unknown. That’s what stresses me. The fear of the unknown, with the addition of neck pain, a headache, and “bruit” sounds in my neck and head… that’s what is keeping me awake tonight.